Thursday, 31 January 2013

If you encounter a velociraptor


If you encounter a velociraptor there are two things that you can do each one will save your live if done correct but if done the slightest bit wrong you will be eaten. 

The first thing you can do is called the bacon distraction. This method is done by taken all the bacon you are currently carrying and throwing it over the velociraptor. This will confuse the raptor because it will smell two sources of food, this will be the best chance to run away and search for the safest area if there are any more raptors in the area. WARNING IF YOU DO NOT CARRY AROUND ANY BACON WITH YOU, YOU’RE AN IDIOT.

The second thing you can do is known as the hit and run. When you are confronted with a velociraptor wait for it to approach you and at the last second flick it in the nose and then punch it in the face. This will deeply confuse the raptor and he will most likely stand there for several minutes before returning to his senses. It this time it is advised that you run as fast as you can and as far as you can in till you can find safety where you are curtain that the raptor wont find you.

7 comments:

  1. Nice: WARNING IF YOU DO NOT CARRY AROUND ANY BACON WITH YOU, YOU’RE AN IDIOT.

    Very funny.

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